It’s a well known fact that we all have different ideas of parenting. We have contrasting views and opinions concerning many a topic and choice. We should all be free to raise our offspring in our own way. However, what is also known is that other people feel the need to interfere, shamelessly judge you or make assumptions based on the unknown. Today I’m addressing a particular topic of much interest and speculation and that’s why I hide my daughter’s face in photos.
The sad thing..
It’s rather unfortunate that I don’t feel I can upload my daughter’s photos online, as I’d actually delight in sharing her beauty with the world. She’s absolutely stunning and that isn’t just me being biased. I witness other Mommy bloggers share their children’s photographs with pride. I’m proud of mine, I want to show her off too! By not doing so it will probably make it harder for me to secure brand work in the future. Any work I do obtain will require more planning for or editing due to the consideration of angles and cropping. Not that I do, but what if I wanted to put her forward for modelling? I wouldn’t be able to. That is of course my choice, though there’s a good few reasons as to why I hide my daughter’s face in photos. I’d rather be safe than sorry.
Protection against snatchers..
I have an online presence, although this is only at a low level. This does mean however, that I don’t have the kind of money required to have home security and such like. Already Autumn’s name has been published on here, as well as other snippets of information. Considering this I don’t wish for her to be then identifiable by her pictures. It takes very little effort for a person to find out too much and target a child.
Despite my personal Facebook having only family and friends, I won’t ever be sharing photos of Autumn in her school uniform as she gets older. You never truly know a person and there’s too many horror stories. Half of the time child abduction cases have been down to a family member! I’m not saying that my family would do that, but if you can’t trust family, you sure as heck can’t trust ‘friends’. The dangers are just too great. The risks are unbearable.
I’ve touched on this a little before on another post. Sadly there has already been police involvement due to my ex’s family. As it’s a police matter, also very personal, I won’t go into it more. Though due to this I don’t wish for them to have access to any updated photos of my daughter. It’s because of this that I choose not to use photos with Autumn in for my profile, cover or featured photos on social media, also asking friends and family not to, either.
My ex’s family may one day find this blog and the thought of that makes my skin crawl. I will take any measures I can to keep information to a minimum and my daughter’s identity hidden from them. Social media once she’s a teen will be monitored and blocks put in place to begin with. Of course over a certain age it will no longer be my place to do so, but whilst she’s a child I will keep her safe! Likewise I’ll be 100% transparent with her and provide any evidence enabling her to make her own informed choices. No games of point scoring, no personal opinions, negative energy or pressure. Pure fact.
But, why the need to explain?
There you have it, that’s why I’ve made the choice to keep my daughter’s identity away from the internet. It does make me question myself, though, why as parents we’re almost expected to share our children’s photos with the world? If we don’t share a hundred photos a minute does it mean they’re not beautiful? Does hiding their faces mean we don’t love them or aren’t proud?
I don’t need validation from family, friends or strangers that Autumn is beautiful, nor does she. Certainly not at the expense of her safety! Posting a tonne of pictures to social media daily means nothing, it doesn’t prove my love for her. I’d rather spend the time with her, or on making movements to better our lives. Why are people berating mothers for their choices? Why are we as a society always tearing one another down? Assumptions – why are they even a thing? If you want to know something just blinking ask the person! Why is everyone so obsessed by what other’s are doing, rather than living their own lives?
A perfect social media reel doesn’t equate to the assumed perfect life. Posting pictures or anecdotes doesn’t prove your worth as a parent anymore than privacy and silence does.
I’m in no way telling anyone what they should do, or judging your choices. You do what’s best for you and yours, meanwhile let me do the same for me and mine. We’re all in this together. Lets support and encourage one another… Not tear each other down.
What do you think then, do you choose to keep your children’s photos private, too? If you do then I’ll bet you’ve faced a plethora of questions, maybe even criticism. How do you deal with it? What other judgement and assumptions have you faced? Leave me a comment below and let me know! Hey, maybe we could be new found friends, united together in the safe cocoon of the supportive and non-judgmental! Get in touch, lets start our own uplifting Mommy’s club!
Sharing is Caring..
I’d like to think this post gives a little food for thought and so please do share it. Share it with the people who maybe need to back off a little. Share it with the Mom’s who need a boost, who need to know they’re not alone. Anybody else that could benefit in any way from this – share it with them!
If you enjoyed this, maybe you’ll appreciate another of my past parenting posts!